Sel-sufficient women's Anatomy

APPETIZER

Before I begin please any one about to read this Post I need you to-
Stand up - find a mirror - look at yourself
If you're a woman give yourself the biggest hug ever for you're blessed
if you're a man then get the hell away from that mirror and TAKE A BOW FOR THE NAME OF ALL WOMEN KIND ( and better luck next time)

Now to the Main course

Just give us another 15 years and all females walking this planet including animals will become completely Self sufficient and I mean literally we wont even need to look outside for food we’ll find it within our own bodies. At this point you’ll be wondering how the hell we’ll find food within our own bodies? (Don’t worry we wont eat ourselves)
Picture this

(Liquids)
God gave us 2 beautiful lumps that produce pretty much the best milk you can get
So we’ll attach a plastic straw and boom we got the drinks aspect covered.

Ps. if you’re a DD size forget the straws you’re set for life


If you're too bloated from milk then the best alternative is a cup of salty tears kills’ bloating & cures indigestions
If you cry a lot & you’re in the money making business then you can start
With selling your tears, half closed swollen eyes are a small price to pay



(Solids)
I don’t know about you but I eat my hair on a daily basis and it comes in so many flavors depending on your shampoo I personally like the coconut & walnut scent but I guess we can always use garlic & beans shampoo if you’re feeling like something salty.

Also we can feed on our nails it’s a common thing these days but we’ll personalize it more by creating flavored nail polish to help you digest your nails faster.

And for a light snack nothing better than the never ending flavored lip balms.
Kills your night cravings instantly – directions – Apply, suck your lips dry,
Re-apply & repeat.


After following this diet We’ll all be skinny and pretty and MANkind will eradicate from jealousy




The bammblliinnggggss of a drunken RUM with 2 drops of whiskey & a shot of vodka